Indeed, a quote from the The Prisoner - a truly rubbish, existential (in the mind of the writers maybe), 60s trippy tosh that seems somehow to have gained a cult reputation as brilliant, Erm...why? Now, if it were The Saint, or The Persuaders, or Department S, or The Champions...that'd be completely different.
Of course, in the US I am a number. In fact, I'm a social security number (SSN), which I assume is the equivalent of my UK National Insurance Number. Overlooking my previous posting and the hideous circular argument that is not being able to get credit cards in the US because I don't have any credit history in the US, I do at least have an SSN. Hurrah...
Our problem. Steph and the kids, but most importantly Steph. When we go to apply for SSNs for Steph, Joe & Hannah we'll be declined and we'll have to get a big piece of paper saying that they don't qualify. This is because we're actually in the US as a consequence of my work visa i.e. it applies only to me. Steph and the kids are in the country on derivative visas, and in Steph's case she cannot work. Steph's real cut up about that :-)
There is something you can get instead of an SSN. It's a Tax Identification Number (TIN). Unfortunately, Steph won't be able to get one of these until I file my first US tax returns; that's about March 2009.
This may not be a problem per se, except that banks, where I'll want to add Steph as a joint name probably won't do so without an SSN or number of some kind.
And don't even get me thinking about the hideousness we're going to endure when we try to buy & license a car: I don't have a license and won't have until the year is up on my being seizure free, but I do have an SSN, etc.; Steph has a license and can switch to a US State license, but I think she'll struggle because of no SSN, insufficient identification and so on.
It's not that I like being a number, but in this instance I'd love us to be numbers that exist somewhere in the colossal machine that is the US. Trouble is I have a horrible suspicion that it's just not going to be that easy.
Ho hum...
Sunday, 27 January 2008
Buying cell phones
Today I had the pleasure of trying to buy cell phones for the family and the surreal experience of being Johnny Foreigner abroad. Thank goodness for Joseph Heller who's already described the nightmare experience I suffered: Catch-22.
Although it ended up being 2 hours of my life that I'll never get back, it started with me feeling all calm and collected. I even went so far as to let the Verizon salesperson serve a couple of other people first even though I was next in the queue. I did this 'cos I'm English and civilised and my parents brought me up with very good manners. Plus I suspected that my purchase might take a while.
I was well prepared: I knew precisely which Treo model I wanted, I knew which free phones to get for Steph & Joe, and I knew exactly which family tariff I was after. And I was armed with my American Express Gold Card - issued in the US and ready for me to use. Surely no problem. I'd even remembered to bring along my passport as ID and my social security number.
IT WAS A HELLISH EXPERIENCE !!! They wanted to take my money and I wanted to spend my money. Unfortunately their credit department consider me a risk because...wait for it...I have no credit history in the US. Aaaarrgghhh........ You will not be surprised to learn that I was declined for an HSBC credit card because...I have no US credit history. Bear in mind that I bank with First Direct (part of HSBC) in the UK and have done for 15 years or so. This made their second reason for declining me even more infuriating: no established history with HSBC bank! Boo! Hiss! HSBC - you suck.
Amex have seen fit to give me a card based on my 30 years of credit history in the UK. Even the small credit union I'm using for my banking are able and sensible enough to refer to my UK credit history via Experian (a global credit agency, used in the US too, no less) to arrange for loans and a US credit card for me. Kudos and respect go to both organisations, but especially Bethpage Federal Credit Union (take a bow) given their respective size when compared to Amex. Clearly both sensible, flexible and sane organisations.
Was there any budging by Verizon? No, there wasn't. They suck. Not their sales staff who could not have been more apologetic, but certainly the brainless, rulebook following robots in whatever department who aren't prepared to let me have these phones without paying an additional security.
I hear you say, "Security payment? Surely that's OK then?". Well, yes indeed if it had been sensible. Only they wanted me to pay $400 per phone. That's $1200 of my own money, which they would then keep and return to me in a year ?!!? It's OK, they'd give me the interest too. Yeah right, I'll give you $1200 of my money (overlooking the $350 I was paying for the Treo too) so you can sit on it. Like I'm not going to need that some time in the coming months while we try and sort ourselves out in a new country. No matter. Surely they'd compromise and make it, say $200 per phone. I'd pay that if they were willing to meet me half way. No chance.
So, I walked away. The irony was that in the same Circuit City store I then proceeded to lavish thousands of dollars on all the new, replacement electronics we're going to need.
End of rant: and, of course, I'll go back tomorrow, tail between leg, and do exactly what they want 'cos I have no choice :-)
Although it ended up being 2 hours of my life that I'll never get back, it started with me feeling all calm and collected. I even went so far as to let the Verizon salesperson serve a couple of other people first even though I was next in the queue. I did this 'cos I'm English and civilised and my parents brought me up with very good manners. Plus I suspected that my purchase might take a while.
I was well prepared: I knew precisely which Treo model I wanted, I knew which free phones to get for Steph & Joe, and I knew exactly which family tariff I was after. And I was armed with my American Express Gold Card - issued in the US and ready for me to use. Surely no problem. I'd even remembered to bring along my passport as ID and my social security number.
IT WAS A HELLISH EXPERIENCE !!! They wanted to take my money and I wanted to spend my money. Unfortunately their credit department consider me a risk because...wait for it...I have no credit history in the US. Aaaarrgghhh........ You will not be surprised to learn that I was declined for an HSBC credit card because...I have no US credit history. Bear in mind that I bank with First Direct (part of HSBC) in the UK and have done for 15 years or so. This made their second reason for declining me even more infuriating: no established history with HSBC bank! Boo! Hiss! HSBC - you suck.
Amex have seen fit to give me a card based on my 30 years of credit history in the UK. Even the small credit union I'm using for my banking are able and sensible enough to refer to my UK credit history via Experian (a global credit agency, used in the US too, no less) to arrange for loans and a US credit card for me. Kudos and respect go to both organisations, but especially Bethpage Federal Credit Union (take a bow) given their respective size when compared to Amex. Clearly both sensible, flexible and sane organisations.
Was there any budging by Verizon? No, there wasn't. They suck. Not their sales staff who could not have been more apologetic, but certainly the brainless, rulebook following robots in whatever department who aren't prepared to let me have these phones without paying an additional security.
I hear you say, "Security payment? Surely that's OK then?". Well, yes indeed if it had been sensible. Only they wanted me to pay $400 per phone. That's $1200 of my own money, which they would then keep and return to me in a year ?!!? It's OK, they'd give me the interest too. Yeah right, I'll give you $1200 of my money (overlooking the $350 I was paying for the Treo too) so you can sit on it. Like I'm not going to need that some time in the coming months while we try and sort ourselves out in a new country. No matter. Surely they'd compromise and make it, say $200 per phone. I'd pay that if they were willing to meet me half way. No chance.
So, I walked away. The irony was that in the same Circuit City store I then proceeded to lavish thousands of dollars on all the new, replacement electronics we're going to need.
End of rant: and, of course, I'll go back tomorrow, tail between leg, and do exactly what they want 'cos I have no choice :-)
Wednesday, 23 January 2008
Exercise - pah!
I'm not saying that I'm going stir-crazy in the hotel...but things have gotten so bad that I went out on Saturday and bought some trainers (read: sneakers), shorts and T-shirts. Cost me a pretty penny too (sorry, Steph). Yes indeedy, I am starting to use the hotel gym. Perhaps it's a mid-life crisis ;-)
Anyway since there's one at the hotel it seemed rude not to use it, especially as there's a gym at Fairfield Gables in Setauket too (i.e. where we'll be renting for the first year or so). And you, my reader(s), will be thrilled to hear that I spent 40 mins there this evening - some sit ups, curls, bench presses, cycling. It will be no surprise to those who know me to hear that I thought I was going to faint at the end !! I hear things can only get better; I sure hope so.
I have to admit that I did feel better, and also all righteous when I stopped at the hotel shop to buy some orange juice and some cranberry juice. Let's see how long this lasts.
In the meantime back to some good ol' country on my Facebook account.
Tuesday, 22 January 2008
US TV (sigh)
I really have tried to like US telly, but I'm beginning to think that the deadly combination of the writers' strike, lazy broadcasting (i.e. endless re-runs and (worse still) 'marathons') and the lack of cable TV in my room is conspiring against me. Of course, there are also the endless channels trying to sell me (ironic grin) exercise equipment or some evangelical channel wanting me to send money.
Don't get me wrong, I love US TV drama - check out my favourite TV shows on my Facebook page. There are few I dislike and I love Six Feet Under, Rescue Me, Dexter, Numb3rs, Without A Trace - the list goes on. But, please, ad breaks every 7 mins - aaarrrggghhh.
However, this brings me to the main point: US ads rock! Sure, mixed in with the really good stuff is some truly bad stuff. But when they're good, they're really good. And sure I appreciate that sometimes they're inane or cheesy but that just makes them all the more appealing to me. Top 3 favourites at the moment are as follows (enjoy):
3rd - Bud Light 'talking to animals'
2nd - Subway 'receipt for burgers'
1st - but pride of place goes to the Jeep ad (sure, I'm a sucker for the 70s-tastic song, but it is, as my US colleagues would say, "totally freakin' awesome").
Enjoy...
Don't get me wrong, I love US TV drama - check out my favourite TV shows on my Facebook page. There are few I dislike and I love Six Feet Under, Rescue Me, Dexter, Numb3rs, Without A Trace - the list goes on. But, please, ad breaks every 7 mins - aaarrrggghhh.
However, this brings me to the main point: US ads rock! Sure, mixed in with the really good stuff is some truly bad stuff. But when they're good, they're really good. And sure I appreciate that sometimes they're inane or cheesy but that just makes them all the more appealing to me. Top 3 favourites at the moment are as follows (enjoy):
3rd - Bud Light 'talking to animals'
2nd - Subway 'receipt for burgers'
1st - but pride of place goes to the Jeep ad (sure, I'm a sucker for the 70s-tastic song, but it is, as my US colleagues would say, "totally freakin' awesome").
Enjoy...
Sunday, 20 January 2008
Toys for the boys
Yesterday was a truly exciting day as I spent most of the morning browsing all the new electronics that I'm going to need to buy this side of the Pond. The fact that the voltage is different over here provided me with the ideal excuse to leave everything behind in the UK and buy everything again from scratch - mmmmm!
So, before going to a colleagues for dinner we stopped off at Circuit City so I could idle a few hours of my life away staring lovingly at consumer electronics in a way that Steph would never let me do :-) But this time I'm listing everything I'm actually, truly going to buy:
Samsung 40" HDTV LCD 120Hz 1080p - oh, yes!!
Couple of TV/DVD combos for Joe & Hannah
Furniture to sit the TV on
2 new top-spec laptops, with built-in Webcams, BluRay DVD players
WiFi printer
Onkyo 7.1 receiver to hook up the TV and cable boxes to
XBox360
Pioneer multi-region DVD - online from http://www.dvdcity.com/
Did I have a great time? You bet I did. And I topped it all off by lavishing a couple of boxed DVD sets (Shark: Season 1 and Planet Earth) on myself (TV in the room sucks) - all in the interests of experimenting with the use of my new Amex card, of course ;-)
And, frankly, I needed to spoil myself after the hell and frustration of trying to sort out bank accounts, buying a car, etc. But I'll tell you more about the joy of those on another post.
Saturday, 19 January 2008
Laundry day
Well, I can't put it off any longer; I've run out of pants !!!! Which of course means something entirely different in the States.
Sure does take me back to my youth and when I first left home and my many years of bachelorhood. Ah, those Sunday evenings at the launderette, reading a good book, pretending to be all independent and liberated. But that was long ago and I'm more used to throwing my laundry in a basket and have it magically reappear in drawers, wardrobes, or wherever! At least I manage to hit the laundry basket. Joe & Hannah are more inclined to hurl laundry around their respective bedrooms in the vague hope that "Mum" picks it up and sorts it....which of course she does. That still doesn't mean that we don't occasionally find some article of clothing festering in some dark corner of the room. Ugh!!
I calculate that I'll have two more laundry days - if I'm lucky (and stinky) - so March can't come quick enough so I can see a little more of that whole 'laundry magic' thing. Plus, those machines sure are complicated for a simple, uneducated man like me.
Friday, 18 January 2008
Time to kick start this thing
Well, I have my laptop - courtesy of my new employers, the American Institute of Physics - so it's about time I started writing this blog thingy. I thought it'd be useful (read: therapeutic) to record my thoughts on the 'fun' of this transatlantic move for me and all the family. As I record more of how things are progressing and get used to this, I guess I'll start to add work-related thoughts and ideas as well.
To 
start: to say that I've underestimated the move and all the logistics and the stress is a little like saying Tom Brady is an OK Quarterback (go Patriots!). However, I guess it's character forming and one of those instances where I'm going to look back on it in 6 months - in the glorious sunshine of a Long Island summer - and wonder what all the fuss was. We shall see...
start: to say that I've underestimated the move and all the logistics and the stress is a little like saying Tom Brady is an OK Quarterback (go Patriots!). However, I guess it's character forming and one of those instances where I'm going to look back on it in 6 months - in the glorious sunshine of a Long Island summer - and wonder what all the fuss was. We shall see...At the moment I'm enjoying the hospitality of the Residence Inn, Plainview, Long Island. It fits the bill, for the moment, but no substitute for sharing a home with Steph, Joe & Hannah - but one thing at a time. Counting down the days until March 2nd.
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